One thought spiraled down a staircase that could have very well ended up in depression. In short, I was beginning to believe that my dreams were too dreamy, too idealistic, and maybe even a bit unrealistic. I couldn’t tell you where the thought started. It just happened.
And while I totally understand and am a HUGE advocate for being okay with not being okay (even when those emotions are negative), I just didn’t feel like that shit. I didn’t feel like feeling hopeless and tired. Lately, I’ve been on top of the world, and I just prefer to stay up there for a bit. *Shrugs*
I had to bust a move.
I’ve been experimenting with this self-learned tactic lately that actually works (when I remember to do it). It’s super easy. However I’m feeling, or whatever I’m thinking, should it be negative, and I don’t want to feel that way, then I think in terms of opposites.
I suffer with anxiety pretty badly. Through meditation, refusal to rush, preparation versus procrastination, crystal work, and EFT tapping–which I’ve just been turned on to, thanks to Abiola–I’ve been handling it pretty darn good. However, it has its way of still creeping in from time to time.
In those moments, I take a deep breath and consider my most pressing concern. Usually, it either has to do with money, feeling like I have too much on my plate, or being stuck in traffic. If I’m feeling broke, for instance, then I’ll consider the opposite of being broke, which is wealth. What would I do if I were wealthy that I can do right now?
I can plan the shit out of my next vacation, or (even if I’m the one doing it), I can get my hair and nails done. I can go dressed, which has an incredible way of making you feel better. And if I feel like it, then I can drive out to Tybee Beach or Forsyth Park, lay a blanket out, and chill.
The point is to regain control of your thoughts.
By thinking of all the things you can do, you’re already transforming the negative into a positive. The next step is to do it, which further reminds me of the importance of choosing something that you can do and that you don’t mind doing. If I’m depressed, for example, I more than likely won’t feel like getting in my car and going anywhere. In that instance, I’ll choose something easier.
Either way, I’m choosing.
Tonight, I chose to write a list. I was sitting at the desk when Eleggua started telling me that my dreams were out of reach. For a second, I almost believed it, then I caught myself. Instead of accepting that ride to hopelessness, I took the opposite approach. Instead of feeling like I couldn’t, I wanted to feel like I could. I decided to make a list of things that I wasn’t so sure I’d accomplish but did.
Afterwards, I wrote a prayer. A super simple prayer, giving gratitude for how far I’ve come, all that I’ve earned, the ability to recognize and change my thoughts to better serve me, the power to manifest, and the beauty of my future. It worked.
#Ashe