Organized Noize produced almost everything hip-hop coming out of Atlanta in the ’90s. They did a lot of work for Outkast, Goodie Mob, Killer Mike, Ludacris, and produced TLC’s “Waterfalls” (thinking of that song makes me want to do the butterfly). Recently, they released a must-watch Netflix documentary. One part that stuck with me was Ray Murray (who played an undercover huge role in the group) talking about the growing pressure of creating hits. You make one and they expect better the second time and even greater the third.
Can you imagine?
Your livelihood hanging on the threads of an audience loving your latest work as much or more than they did the last one? How intimidating is that? On one hand, I can’t imagine how that kind of pressure can hinder your ability to get in your zone, stay in your zone, trust your zone, and consistently create. On the other hand, I can because I am living it now. It sucks.
Doing something big for the first time is nerve wrecking enough, but doing it the second time? Then the third? It’ll really trip you up if you ain’t careful–or should I say mindful. That pressure don’t start fucking with you until you internalize it. At first it’s motivation and full of feel-good (they love my idea). When the idea hits you, it’s exciting. Then you get started on it and the juices ain’t just flowing, they’re gushing. Then…at some point (or points), you get tired. Frustrated. Bored. Or pushed into overdrive, which ain’t a bad place to be if it’s encouraged by inspiration and curiosity.
Don’t let your fear of not giving the people what they want come in between you and your magic.
Totally talking to me too right now. Because I certainly went through it with my second novel and now my third. Going through it with my second retreat and Griot Grounds workshop as well.
I know I’m under pressure when:
- I get super easily distracted when working on it
- I’m spending ridiculous amounts of time on Facebook + Instagram
- Working on it feels like homework (or detention)
- Stress shows up in the form of back aches, acne, constipation, exhaustion, frustration, stubborn hair.
- I start slacking off in healthy habits
- I crave brownies, root beer, alcohol, mashed potatoes, Carrabbas bread, and ice cream
- My to-do list keeps growing and growing and begins overwhelming me
- I either want a whole lotta sex or none at all
- The whole journey is tiring and I’m just ready to get it over with!
If I meditated twice a day, everyday, like I want to, then I’m sure I’d catch it faster. Crazy thing is: Sometimes I’ll recognize what’s going on and just not feel like making myself feel better. I know yoga or dancing will soothe my back, but I’m bucking. I know it’s been a while since I worked out, but I don’t feel like getting back in the groove. That’s when my mama voice kick in (yes, to myself). This ain’t what’s up. You’re neglecting yourself. Get it together.
It might not be your livelihood on the line and it might be your first time at it. The pressure is still present though. And when someone expresses that they’re going through this, I first ask if they can let it go for a second. Sometimes you gotta set aside, give yourself time to re-center, and then come back to it. Other times, you gotta fill up your water bottle, turn off your WiFi, do 25 jump and jacks, and power through it. Let your spirit tell you when to do which.
Another word for pressure is anxiety, which means you’re worried that something won’t turn out the way you’d like.
As the old folks says, whatever you’re worried about “is neither here nor there.” The best way to relieve yourself when under pressure is to slow down. Unplug. #TimeOutToTuneIn. Make yourself take care of yourself. Recognize your patterns and tend to them (instead of excessively cracking your neck, back, and knuckles, get up and stretch/walk). Breathe. Remember that you don’t want to plant that hurried/irritated energy in your project. Nothing but TLC.
P.S.: Whether you’re pushing through and falling back for a sec, you GOTTA check out the next #BetweenWordsandWater retreat. If you wanna write, you’ll get plenty of support. If you wanna chill, you’ll have plenty of space to do that. No cooking because we have a chef. No cleaning. No working. You’re only responsible for what you wanna do. Check it out.