8 (perfectly okay) ways to feel about what’s going on

Even before what happened yesterday in Dallas, things were getting kinda crazy in America. There were so many opinions, so many lack of my opinions, mixed feelings. I experienced so much of it myself and was the sounding board for others, including children, in this social/political/emotional struggle. And though I have my own strong feelings about all of this, I still value how you feel in your inner world. Hopefully, you do too. If not, I pray this helps.

 

Scared

This is a perfectly rational response. You may have been told that fear is a programmed response and isn’t how we’re genetically designed to respond. That’s a damn lie. Can you act in spite of fear? Yes. Are you wrong for shutting down and wishing it all away? Hell no. That’s self-preservation. Only you know what’s best for you in this moment. Feel through it. Write about it. Talk about it. Prioritize your peace of mind.

 

Overwhelmed

I didn’t watch the Alton Sterling video until two days later. Almost immediately after I did, I learned about the Minnesota shooting. The girlfriend of the victim is related to one of my Facebook friends. It was too much. I remember just closing the laptop. I didn’t even turn it off. It was just too much. If you’re nodding, ain’t nothing wrong with it. Do what you gotta do for you, boo. Prioritize your peace of mind.

 

Fired up

You can’t type fast enough. If you had a jump rope, you could probably bust out a good ten-fifteen minutes straight with all the energy that’s surging through your veins. You’re organizing. You’re planning. You’re ready! I feel you. Anger’s place is inflaming change. As quoted in Women Who Ain’t Afraid to Curse When Communicating with God, “Some shit is gonna call for fire, plain and simple.” In all that red, don’t forget to fall back in the blue every now and then. Can’t remember which of my Instagram friends said it, but free yourself; go to the mountains, to the beach, to the river, the skating rink, your meditation room, your happy place. Prioritize your peace of mind.

 

Acceptance

Here’s a piece of Akilah’s Wednesday Facebook post that was so on point I forgot to respond: “When I told my daughters about Alton Sterling’s lynching, one of them looked at me like I was the one tripping. She said, ‘that’s the norm, Mama…’” My son had the same response. He just stared at me, slow-blinking as if to ask, “and the point of this conversation is what?” That’s not a kiddie feeling. That’s real shit. Understandable too. Sometimes our reactions, especially the initial ones, are safeguards. Your body knows what it needs. Prioritize your peace of mind.

 

Disgusted

Because this is fucking ridiculous. It is, and I feel this too. Our lives mean nothing in the world of white supremacy, which are the (on-paper) powers that be. On top of that, these comments. The steady blaming the victim, the constant rebuttal that all lives matter, the friends and co-workers whose opinions/existence you wish you could backspace. All of it. You’re disgusted and that’s okay. Don’t forget that, though, that it’s also spiritually exhausting. Unwind often. Breathe deeply. Prioritize your peace of mind.

 

Wide-eyed

You’re just paying attention, taking it all in. From the outside looking in, it’d appear that you ain’t even affected. It’s playing out like a movie and those around you are seemingly swept away by everything that’s going on while you’re sitting back and stroking your chin. Disbelief? Saw this coming? Either way, ain’t nothing wrong with it. Just be sure to disengage every now and then. Prioritize your peace of mind.

 

Tickled

When you heard about what happened in Dallas, you probably turned into Oprah on the Color Purple. Sat up in your seat and all. “Oh… Sofia home, now. Sofia home. Things is gonna be changin’ around here. Pass me them peas, boy.” Not too many people gon’ understand or empathize with that feeling, but fuck ’em. If that’s how you feel, then that’s how you feel. Even in this tickled state, don’t forget to recenter and prioritize your peace of mind.

 

Some, maybe all, or none of these perfectly okay emotions

You might feel something in one another and something completely different in another. You might be frozen in place because you’re feeling so many things at once. Or maybe it’s all combined and has created a sadness that’s on the verge on depression. Then again, you’re probably shrugging about it because you don’t know how to feel. Don’t look down on yourself about it. It’s normal. Just be sure to look out for you. Get it off your chest, your heart. Don’t let it settle in your body. Prioritize your peace of mind.